A few more facebook posts

We took the kids to the zoo today (thought it was fitting since the sound coming from the inside of our minivan sounds like the zoo half the time). My 3 and 4 year old children were great...the 19 month old...not so much. I would have left her at the "blood curdling screeching-totally out of their minds- monkey exhib...it" had the zoo had one of those. But alas they didn't...so we reluctantly brought her home.

I'm thinking that the bandaids in the bandaid box, that I found floating just under the surface of the toilet bowl water, are no longer sterile. Anyone think differently?

Went to the gym again this morning. I kind of feel like a nun in a biker bar, or a sheep amongst wolves. But you know what? I kind of like it....being so close to "danger," entering a world far apart from "Dora", where nobody wears a diaper (I think...I hope). Maybe I'll start teasing my hair before I go, or apply ...a fake tattoo on my neck, or buy my own leather lifting belt. The possibilities are endless!

Went to the gym. Joan Jett look allike was not there, but work boot, jean shorts, leather lifting weight belt guy was. Also there was crazy, psycho, ex-con looking (yet very attractive), "flea" look-a-like from RHCP, US POSTAL WORKER guy who I've heard say such things as: parole officer, "should have pulled a knife"..., "Fahgettaboutit", and "....gun." I feel so close to danger while riding the recumbant bike!

The classy scene and very classic line of "DOODIES DOODIES!!!" from Caddy Shack is what came to mind after what happened in the tub this evening. Unfortunately, a "Baby Ruth" is not what was lurking in the bubbly water.

My 15 year college reunion is going on this weekend and I'm not there :-( However, rumor has it that the guy I adored all through college, who wouldn't give me the time of day, showed up at the reunion and the first thing he said to my friend was, "Is Colleen here?"...you snooze you lose buddy :-) Aaaaah, life is good.

My brother is going to Rage Against the Machine tonight in L.A. I would love to get crazy in a mosh pit, but remembered that I'm a wimp so I would only want to mosh with about 2 other small people, & I wouldn't be able to whip my head around b/c I would get a headache, & my husband reminded me I wouldn't be able to jum...p (it's hazardous "condition" many women share after childbirth)...

This would make the 7th day in a row I've woken up and had to clean up "D" (a.k.a. "the runs") from my poor little baby girl. AND the 6th morning it's been so bad I've had to change her sheets. (Don't worry..I've been talking to her doc). We won't get into the smell... Oh, and so sorry if you didn't want to read ab...out this crap (no pun intended), but after SEVEN days it became fb worthy!

My son is with his Nonni and B tonight and my husband put our littlest one to bed, and I went out for ice cream with my sweet little Kate. We sat outside the ice cream shop in the center of town, and she said "hi" to the moon and commented on the cars going by. Then we held hands and went into a few shops together. I...t certainly changed this Tuesday around for me :-)

It's only Tuesday?? Give me strength.....

Did you know that approximately 30 crayons and a pacifier can fit into the hole in the leg curl feature of a Solo-flex machine? Well my dad does, courtesy of his precious little granddaughter. Happily they came out easily and he can continue on with his daily exercise routine. Although I think any resistance they ma...y have given would have just added to the machine's muscle building potential.

Ever have a day when everything that happens seems like it could be a funny post? I do. It's hard to pick just one thing, but I have to or else I would seem like some crazy fb addict (which I'm totally not..not..not). Quote of the day btwn my 3 yr old and 4 yr old (said in a very annoyed tone): "Don't squeeze your ...bum so tight when someone is under your bum!"

No, I don't think "life is like a box of chocolates" b/c you know you're going to get something good if not great (and the box comes with a little chocolate seating chart anyway). No, life is more like a bag of oranges, a bowl of cherries, a pint of blueberries....You might bite into the best thing you've ever had, th...e worst, or somewhere in between.

needs a break, and it's not even 8am!!!!

I was sharing a tender moment this evening, with the little lady in my profile picture. I was rocking her and singing to her before bed and she was patting my face. Then without warning, she stuck her finger so uncomfortably far up my nose that my eyes teared and I began sneezing. She laughed and said, "neezing! aa...aachoo!" I guess it could have been a good kleenex commercial.

I've posted lately about my 3 and 4 year old children speaking in Spanish courtesy of "Dora" and "Diego" (they do it at the tv and also with each other). Anyway, my NINETEEN MONTH OLD handed my son the ball he had been playing with and he said, "gracias" and SHE SAID, "dee nahna"! You could have knocked me over with ...a feather! I had to re-attach my jaw to the rest of my face after that.

Tough day for my son: arm pinched in kitchen door, fell of couch and landed (lip first) onto a hard plastic dinosaur tail, slipped and hit his upper teeth/lip on a open drawer, & got off his swing and ran directly into his sister (also swinging) & was knocked down (all b/c I said, "do you want a marshmallow?" he only ...had tunnel vision for that little puff ball of sugar). Sleep well son, tomorrow is a new day.

"I don't skinny dip....I chunky dunk" hahahahaha! (oh, and by the way...that's chunky dunk WITH a bathing suit on!)

While driving on this 88 degree humid day, I realized that my seat warmer was ON!!!! I thought I was having a hot flash or a stroke!!!!

My brother and his family just left for home today (I miss them). Anyway, while here they bought "California Baby" brand natural bug repellent for baby Michael. They headed home today so he gave it to me for my kids....because they don't have biting bugs at his home...in California.....where my brother and his "California baby" live.

I just had the most spectacular day EVER with my three beautiful children!! I joke a lot and tell stories about the funny things that they/I do, but it's all out of love (and for a laugh). Sometimes it's hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel with three small children, but today I not only saw the light, but I felt it. And it was wonderful!

It was just about 8 years ago, on a July day like today (i.e., brutally hot), that I unknowingly stepped in a steaming pile of dog crap, just before walking into a snooty bridal salon for a final bridesmaid dress fitting. I didn't notice the stench, and start gagging, until I was half undressed in that tiny dressing room. Aaah, good times...good times.

My children have been speaking a lot of Spanish to each other since they began watching "Dora" and "Diego" (they've also started SHOUTING in Spanish at the t.v....thank you Nick and Nick
Jr!). Anyway, just now while in their little pool I thought my son
called my daughter a "grassy ass", but he was saying "gracias."

My 18 month old took an extra loooong nap today and now she is in bed for the night. Guess she needed to sleep off her hangover :-)....refer to yesterdays post if this is confusing to you.

What a wonderful day with my family! I think my 18 month old had the best time though. We think she finished off my mom's vodka gimlet when nobody was looking...she had the empty glass in her hand. A little while later she was seen wearing a tupperware container on her head. You know the saying, "it's not a party ti...ll a toddler gets drunk." That's a saying, right? Happy 4th to all!

Dreamed I was making Thanksgiving dinner last night - wrong holiday! Happy 4th everyone!!

Yesterday I went swimming in a pool and then LAYED OUT with MY EYES CLOSED for about TEN MINUTES!!!! I haven't done that since the summer of 2004!! WOW! What an AWESOME start to the weekend!!! AND today I have the day OFF!!! That's right!!! My brother is in town with Elena, and their little muffin nugget cheesebur...ger hotfudge sundae with a cherry on top, cutie pa-tootie baby boy...and I'm visiting them..ALONE!!

If you frequently look for my posts (because you enjoy reading them) but don't comment (or even if you do comment) and/ or you've told me that I should write a book will you please click the "like" option. Also, please comment on why you would buy a book that I wrote (I guess you can also comment on why you wouldn't b...uy I book from me..I'll take the criticism). Thanks in advance!!

I'm still dealing with a head cold but I can't complain. The air is dry and there is nothing in the forcast but SUN for the next several days. LOVE IT! (this means I don't need to be tranquilized anymore....just in case anyone was heading this way to knock me out for several days).

Last year I put out a plea for someone to come by and shoot me with a tranquilizer gun. Well, I'd like to put that offer out there again. You see I have a nasty head cold, the humidity is killing me, my older two keep fighting and my little one screeched at so high a decibel and pitch that I can't hear out of my righ...t ear anymore. So again...9pm tonight...tranquilizer gun that could take down a horse,,anyone?

Yesterday I heard: Gloria (Laura Branigan), Nothing Else Matters (Metallica), Even Flow (Pearl Jam), and Kiss on My List (Hall and Oates) and I said, "OH! I LOVE THIS SONG!!!" to each one. How random (or just strange) is MY taste in music.

dreamed that the Sox were in the world series & Fenway was on the beach. Paplebon was refusing to pitch or get in uniform but rather, was playing outfield in a red & white polka dot bathing suit that only covered his front (cute). I wasn't at the game though because my HUSBAND was highlighting my hair! After he fini...shed I hopped on some ladies lark to get to McDonald's and get breakfast (gross).

So the other day I clicked "like" on "the bible" because, well, I like the bible. However, I didn't realize I'd be getting status updates from "the bible" 3-4 times a day! I've now "hid" "the bible" on this Sunday afternoon. No offense "the bible" but you're getting in the way of all the other status updates. We're... supposed to get thunderstorms tonight/ tomorrow...please pray I don't get struck.

I'm so sorry if you have hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia and you're reading this right now. I'm not trying to be mean, really, I'm not. Just having some totally lame Friday night fun....totally lame! (PS, don't ask me what it means...google it...PSS, thanks Shannon!).

I just (accidentally) snorted some coffee grounds....I guess that's one way to wake up!

I feel like I'm living in The Truman Show. It seems like every day the UPS man drives by at the same time and waves, which is not that odd because he's probably on a schedule. However, every day when he drives by I'm standing at the swingset pushing my kids. No wonder why I feel like I need to escape sometimes....al...l the time...no no, just sometimes :-) Um, have any of you been secretly watching me on tv?

Humidity: I HATE it!!!!! I looooath it!!!! It makes me feel like a greasy, oily, frizzy, sticky, slimy lump of flesh. I don't like air that's heavy and wet and hard to move in. I don't like feeling like I constantly need a shower. I don't complain about the cold, or the snow or the wind or the rain.....but HUMIDITY...GRRRR!!

Things that are NOT good: coming around the corner to see your toddler standing at the top of the stairs with a marble in her hand. I believe the only thing missing from this scenario to make it complete would be a pair of scissors in her other hand....and perhaps an outlet close by.

The kids were helping me garden and my son said, "Mom, I don't know where you'd be without us kids." (I immediately thought of about 10 places I could be today). I said, "Oh really, where do you think I'd be?" He said, "Africa. Working ALL day and ALL night. They have farms there, right?" I told my brother what m...y son said, he thinks it's my skin coloring that made my son think of Africa. I think he's right.

Had our first trip to Duxbury beach yesterday and had a great time, but I learned in a VERY clear way that I cannot make this trip alone. You see, the 17 month old ran up and down the walkway and ramp the whole time, my 3 year old sat covered in sand the whole time (she was easy), and my son wanted in the water, but r...equired assistance. Going alone will be no "day at the beach", if you catch my drift.

Upon waking I didn't know that I would be going to the wake of a mother I know from church. I didn't know she had been battling with cancer for the past 4 yrs. I didn't know that I was going to totally lose it at the funeral home. What DO I know? That my heart is breaking for her 5 year old daughter and for her husb...and. I hugged my kids extra tight today, not b/c I have THEM, but because they have ME.

My husband just let me sleep in until 8:30! When I came downstairs he was just finishing up getting everyone dressed and was heading out with them to the park. I'm sitting in a quite kitchen, eating breakfast and sipping of coffee! I love you Jeff Ladino!!!!!!!

I think that taking a relaxing shower alone is soooo overrated. I mean why on earth would you want to do that when you can have a little boy pull back the curtain and comment on & question everything you're doing (and about your body i.e., "mom, what are those called again?"), all the while two little girls are screec...hing and fighting over the stool at the sink? Believe me when I tell you, there is NO greater joy!

There is a "sketchy/weathered/scrawny/older-ish" looking man that is doing carpentry work on a house up the street from me. While walking by his truck yesterday I noticed a bumper sticker on the back that read: "Dip me in honey and throw me to the lesbians." I felt like showering after the visual image of that poppe...d into my head (AND I think that bumper sticker is horrible!).....

Things you don't usually hear a bunch of boys yelling to each other at the monkey bars on the playground: Boy 1: "What are you waiting for??!!! GO!!!!" Boy 2: "I CAN'T!! The baby is in the way!!!!" You see, my 17 month old has no clue that she's only one and enjoys hanging (unsupported- and with a huge smile on h...er face) on the monkey bars, for great lengths of time. :-)

My husband inspires me to face my fears and overcome them

I just heard my three year old yelling from the living room that she had just seen a kangaroo go by. When I went in to see what she was talking about she was standing on the couch looking out the window with a bra on her head. Here's to hoping that your Monday morning is just as fun, interesting, and exciting as hers is!

I would just like to post that for the second time this week my SEVENTEEN MONTH OLD is NOT NAPPING!!!!!!!!! Is she giving up her naps already?????!!!!!!!!

While walking with my kids today we came across a little dead bird. Not to be graphic (but this needs to be said), the only parts of the bird were it's little legs, feet and bottom half...the top half was nowhere to be found. I explained to my kids that sometimes animals, like cats, like to eat birds. My son stared ...at him and said, "ooooh, I hope he's gonna be okay." It was kind of a "Dumb and Dumber" moment.

is wondering if "No Pudge Fudge Brownies" are still "no pudge" if you add chocolate chips to the batter and then eat them with vanilla ice cream...hmmm...

I got to go out ALL afternoon ALL by myself and do some shopping and have lunch!!....Then I decided to try on bathing suits...aaaah, that was a buzz kill!....I spent the rest of my time trying to figure out how to feel better...so I had some chocolate cake (that should make for an even more pleasant fitting room experience the next time I go).

I'm running an infirmary over here so if you've got a sick kid, come on over and join the fun! We've got fevers, coughing, colorful nasal discharge, "the runs" (my personal favorite), an ear infection, and one mouth infection (following closely behind "the runs" in the "favorite" category). Also, if you're a mom and ...feeling like you're on the edge of losing it, you can come join in the fun too!

It's supposed to be around 92 today. My son and his preschool class went on a field trip today to a berry farm. They went on a hayride and then into a GREENHOUSE!!! Okay, so the last place I would want to be today is in a GREENHOUSE! One of his little classmates PASSED OUT! She's okay I guess but had to be taken b...y ambulance to a hospital as a precaution. Fun times with 3 & 4 year olds!

We showed our 4 year old how to change the channels with the remote so that he can put on Curious George in the morning. George is on channel 44...he hit an extra 4 today...boy am I glad we're not subscribed to "Playboy en espanol"! That would have been a spicy variation to our usual PBS morning.